Save the Rich!
Harris comes to their rescue as Liz comes to hers.
Hey Friends,
This week, I enjoyed the latest HOA meeting, and you better know we are going to war. If your grass is even a quarter inch too long, we're coming for you.
On to the newsletter.
Industry Updates
Ghost announced a new feature this week that makes it easier to offer a single donation to writers like me. I do not want to get too "inside baseball" on newsletter writing, but tips are how I buy coffee to keep my writing on pace, and if there's anything left over, I'll pay the bill for hosting this website. It's always been an option here, but only with a workaround. Now, for those who wish to show their short-term support, you can do that here.
Those who value holding me accountable each Friday to send you the latest can choose long-term support right here.
The rest of you, enjoy, and thanks for reading.
Let's get to The News.
Hot Takes
This 36th Week of 2024
Harris Pitches Tax Plan
Kamala “Great For Business" Harris pitched a new tax plan this week – more specifically, she pitched Joe Biden's plan in the trash. At a campaign event, she presented her own plan, showing her first break from Biden’s policies since he dropped out of the race.
Harris’ tax plan, which experts say is still equally as boring as any other tax plan, proposes a $50,000 tax break for small businesses to offset startup costs, mostly consisting of sub sandwiches and a startup quality espresso maker. She also said she would aim to set capital gains tax rates at a lower rate than Joe's rate of 39.6% capital gains tax for million-dollar earners. Harris proposed a top rate of 28%, which she says "rewards investment," not only by capitulating to her wealthy donors while providing free pastries at fundraising breakfasts but also by ensuring they remain as rich as possible, a plan most rich people favor.
As a business-savvy newsletter writer, I did some research on the implications of the Harris plan and uncovered that I would rather stay in the marketing business, where the rules are mostly made up. However, based on a scan of the 6,871-page tax code, I can share that, in some cases, an investment can itself be a deductible expense; however, under IRC code section 7876-19b, who really knows? It remains a mystery how taxes work, but experts assure us we can pay them to help us figure it out each year. (more)
Breaking RINO
Liz Cheney, the former Republican Representative from Wyoming, said this week she would be voting for Kamala Harris, reminding us once again that she is not running for office. Cheney proudly belongs to no one except her security team, whose goal is to protect her from the death threats she's received since breaking with Trump.
Her vote offers Democrat Harris a margin in the solidly red state "so small, she can't even feel it." Still, her vote is a welcomed gesture to remind her constituents to vote their conscience. Notably, few Trump supporters have one, so Republicans don’t consider her advice a threat to the election results in Wyoming, where three electoral votes have gone to Republican presidential candidates 25 out of the 33 times in its history. (more)
Vance Voted Worst VP Pick
Opinion journalism recently saw the upset of the year when one lone guy, writing an article, voted in his own poll and concluded that J.D. Vance is the worst VP pick ever. The left-leaning pundit Rex Huppke explained the results of the landslide vote, which consisted of his own vote and a transcript of two quotes he found online, along with approximately zero other votes.
The unscientific poll means that Vance now takes the crown as the worst VP candidate in history, dislodging Sarah Palin from her long-held position. Palin has not returned requests for comment, but according to people familiar with the matter, it doesn't appear that she risks being removed from her position as "worst glasses in politics" despite valiant effort from Kirsten Sinema.
With disapproval ratings placing Vance in "probably works in politics" level ratings, Vance hopes to bring his disapproval ratings to the level of Trump's, which are above his by 8 points, which they hope will be enough to take the White House. (more)
Operation Iraqi Freedom
US troops have begun a military operation in Iraq, alongside Iraqi commandos, to attack ISIS insurgents as a follow-up to the war in Iraq that started 23 years ago. Iraq has had a long strategic partnership with the US as they work together to fight terrorism. According to rumors, in the email from the US military to Iraqi Commandos planning the raid, the US didn't sign off with its usual "Regards, US Military," but instead said "Best, US Military." This is, of course, a sign that ISIS has no chance against the counterterrorism measures since they simply end emails with "ISIS," the most savage and passive-aggressive way to end an email. (more)
School Daze
Back to school started with a 14-year-old killing four and injuring eight more in the latest school shooting. In response, gun rights advocates continued to call for more guns, a strategy that math has proven is the problem time and time again. (more)
That's it for this week.
Remember: The Lorem Ipsum is better with friends. Everything else is better with more butter. Please spread both.
Have a great weekend!