The Smallest Bird

Minnesota gets messy and Trump flips.

The Smallest Bird
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Hey Friends,

I like to watch movies in the evening. But sometimes I don't want to commit to a full-length feature film, so I settle for a five-episode binge of my latest serial obsession. Fortunately, this only takes five and a half hours, counting snack breaks.

I know what you're thinking. Don't snack at night, right? Well, I can tell you, it's totally safe, and here's why. Earlier in the day, I switched to 2% milk instead of drinking whole, which saves me 30 calories per serving. Drink six servings, and you've saved yourself a solid 180 calories, or in other words, 200 if you believe in rounding up. That's a solid 10% of my daily calories.

That means that the serving of chips and ranch dip with garlic and dill seasoning (I hear dill adds fiber) leaves me with a deficit, based on a serving size of one ounce, or about 12 chips, clocking in at 160 calories.

Granted, I ate more like 48 chips, but you see where I'm going with this. Lie to yourself enough, and you can justify just about anything.

To that end, I spent a better part of this week trying to figure out how to blame Renee Good, the slain protestor in Minneapolis, for getting killed. I figured it was a good use of time since the FBI spent the better part of this week doing the same, except with a larger supply of donuts and styrofoam cups for their coffee.

Was she out of line for protesting? Was it a little much to bring a car to a knife fight?

I considered that perhaps the fact that her wife called the ice agent “big boy" was reason enough to kill at least one of them, but I wasn’t sure if that was supposed to be considered an insult or a compliment, so I’m gonna put that as a maybe/maybe not. As in maybe she was trying to charm him, and get him into bed with the two of them. Because when the bedroom gets too hot, you're gonna need some ICE.

Of course, the nerve of Renee pulling a car on an agent of the law would alarm just about anyone. If you listen closely to the video, you can hear the ICE agents react with terror, yelling, “Look out, she’s got a car!”

Imagine if it took a three-point turn to pull a gun out, he would have been toast. Fortunately, his gun was quicker than her dual-cam engine and 30-degree turning radius on a vehicle that can go from zero to sixty in 2-3 minutes, without fail, as long as she doesn't need to stop for gas first. Still, the ICE man is quick, but based on his lack of coordination, I’m not sure he can parallel park his duty weapon.

Trump has defended the agent. But why wouldn't he, as a man of unprecedented peace but also power? He is not only the long arm of the law standing up for justice, but also the small hands of peace, making a phallic salute. In his campaign to win next year's Nobel Peace Prize, Trump has invaded Venezuela, threatened military action against Iran for punishing its protestors, threatened the Insurrection Act in Minneapolis so he can punish those who protest him, and then flipped off a heckling worker at a Ford plant when he was there on an official visit.

According to US officials, the agent, Jonathan Ross, who was hit by the vehicle, suffered internal bleeding, which I've had many times, although it's typically just called "a bruise." Based on the video and reports for the lovely Kristi Noem, he was taken to a hospital and released that day to bleed on his own time.

Jonathan faced untold risk in his job. Let's put it this way. If you are a piano mover, and you have fraying rope, and you are lifting a 100-year-old Bösendorfer into an apartment on the 8th floor of a Brooklyn brownstone, you face death every day that you stand underneath the dangling grand enjoying a smoke break. My advice? Move over, maybe about ten feet or so, but then this analogy wouldn't work, would it?

Every day, our men and women in law enforcement face untold dangers, including those they create. So we owe it to them to make sure they feel as safe as possible, so they don't shrink back from the good work of clearing dangerous innocent people off the street. If you want ICE that never melts, you need to tell them you've got their back. Tell them there's a place for every cube in our tray. You need to give them immunity. Thank DHS for doing just that.

That's why Renee Nicole Good should be punished posthumously for being killed by Jonathan Ross. Sure, there's no training for how to act when your governments are at odds with each other, and causing chaos in your neighborhood, but enough about the mother who was taken from her children. Let's worry about Mr. Ross first. How was he supposed to protect himself from her lethal vehicle? I mean, he had no choice but to shoot her. What do you expect a guy to do? Move over?

Of course not.


And on Truthache

It was our first day back with the whole crew after the holiday break, and we had lots to catch up on, including the headlines.

Unplugged and Unhinged - Tall Dark and Handsome | Truthache
What it’s like to take a break and come back to a mess. Well, it’s nice to take a long break from work over the holidays, and we talk about how unplugging can benefit someone who spends all year working hard. Then, we decided to catch up on the latest headlines. After our guest cancelled, we were relieved that we didn’t have to subject them to a discussion about important breaking news, after ICE activity in Minneapolis led to the death of a protester, Renee Nicole Good. We discussed our views on this situation, and, as usual, they are mixed. We discussed what we would do if our own neighborhoods were subject to significant ICE activity. Then we discuss the USA’s renewed commitment to imperialism, what’s happening with Tesla stock (because Michael’s best friend is his car, although Daniel and Aaron are fighting for second best). We then discuss how tariffs affected Michael’s sales and profit margins, since his import-heavy business became our own little scientific study (consisting of a sample size of exactly one business). And then, suddenly, this became a sports talk podcast, with 66% of the hosts not following sports. Tune in to get updates, analysis, and confusion about the game(s) weekly. Mentioned in this episode: An important fact check on a point of discussion: Crowds at some rallies are indeed planned and compensated by organizations like crowdsondemand.com, which is hired by companies as a PR effort and deploys protestors who are compensated. The organization is often hired by for-profit companies and partisan actors. Indivisible also plans rallies and protests, but claims to be a grassroots organization focused on opposing the MAGA movement and authoritarianism. They do not pay protesters and are not hired by for-profit companies. The claim that protests are staged is true, but the claim needs context. In general, studies show that paid or “astroturfed” protests (as opposed to organic “grass roots” protests ) represent less than 5% of all protests in the US. This report shows the “bodycam” footage of the ICE agent who shot Renee Nicole Good, which was actually a handheld cellphone. The department of homeland security claims it is getting dangerous criminals off the streets. It was said on the show that ICE is in neighborhoods for the purpose of serving warrants, however ICE generally operates without judicial warrants, but with a lower administrative warrant issued internally which doesn’t require probable cause nor are they issued by a judge. Some lawsuits assert arrests have taken place without any kind of warrant at all in some cases arresting American citizens, and at least some incidents of this sort have been confirmed. Because this is a critical detail, we wanted to add some additional data for context. According to data from the Transactional Records Access Clearinghouse (TRAC) as of November 30, 2025, ICE detained 65,735 individuals, of whom 73.6% (48,377) had no criminal convictions, while 26.4% (17,358) had criminal convictions. A more detailed breakdown from the Cato Institute, using ICE custody data as of November 15, 2025, indicates that 73% of detainees had no criminal convictions, but 47% had neither convictions nor pending criminal charges—meaning 26% had pending charges (but no convictions) and 27% had convictions. Of those with convictions, only 5% involved violent crimes. About The Hosts: Daniel Herndon is a brand strategist at HRNDN Brand Agency and the author of The Lorem Ipsum. He also produces our podcast. Aaron Douglas is an internet marketing and AI-readiness consultant and the owner of AIRAA. Michael Salemi owns Colored Threads, a company that produces branded apparel and swag, including the Truthache branded tumblers our guests receive.

That's it for this week.

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